1. Pride comes before a fall. Am I being a little too overconfident? Am I setting myself up for failure? I am deathly afraid that I am jinxing myself, that it'll be like in a movie or TV show, where they're super confident about it, and they totally don't get it.
2. What if I do get it? Then, holy crap, I'm going to India for six weeks next summer! That's insane. It's incredibly difficult to wrap my brain around. And so now it's like, if I've got it in the bag (but again, see reason #1), what I really have to do now is prepare myself for actually going to India.
And then, of course, there are other minor worries, like my medical evaluation form, what if, when I go see the doctor, we find out that I have a disease that is jsut debilitating enough to keep me from going?! Or what if I get sent to New Delhi, rather than Pune, where I want to go. And then what if, when I get there, I don't like my host family, and we don't get along? Or, I can't get internet access to access my family and friends? I know that on like some Bollywood movies the families have a computer they use for email and stuff, but then there are other movies where they do not. Where they don't even have cell service.
So, as you can see, I've got several worries. But I just have to keep reminding myself that God will see me through it. Even if I don't have cell or internet for the entire six weeks, I won't be alone, because I will have Him. And even if my host family doesn't like me, I will still have Him. And even if I don't make it, there is always next year, and it was all a part of His plan. But still!