So today is one of the days for graduation. The school I compete at is having their graduation today, so I have a lot of friends who are graduating today.

Initially, I wasn't going to go because I just didn't want to. I hear stories from people about how it's really like sitting for two hours and just hearing names called out, and cheering every once in a while for people you know.

And that just didn't sound fun to me.

Then this morning, I got a text from one of my friends who is graduating today, and she said something like, "You're coming to the ceremony tonight right?"

It was like a knife to the gut.

Because I guess I'd just assumed that the graduates wouldn't care if I came. That was my first mistake. Then, as I realized I had to tell her I couldn't come (for a legitimate reason), I realized that I actually wanted to go. I mean, it would be less exciting if I had to sit by myself, but if I found some friends who were also going, I could sit with them, and it would be fun cheering for my friends who I care about so much, and getting to see them afterwards and congratulate them.

And now I can't go, which is making me feel depressed. Why can't I go? Because earlier this week, when my mom asked me if I had anything going on on this particular night, I said no, because I thought I didn't want to go. So we're having someone over. Not that it won't be fun hanging out with this particular person, but I feel like a horrible human being for not going to the graduation, and it's all my fault that I can't go.

So, friend, if you're reading this, I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry. I wish I could come, but I can't. And now you know why.

BUT for all of my friends who are graduating today, I will probably be at your graduation parties tomorrow! So I'll still get to see you and congratulate you, even if it's not tonight. Though I wish it could be tonight. Okay, that's enough feeling sorry for myself.

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